Kulumikizana
Disembala wina
Ndife pano. Mapeto a chaka afika; tikudziwa kuti ino ndi nthawi yachisangalalo, chikondwerero, ndi kulumikizana ndi okondedwa. Komabe, ambiri amakhala achisoni kapena osungulumwa. Tsoka ilo, kupambana m’moyo masiku ano sikumaphatikizapo mabwenzi. Chikuchitika ndi chiyani? Daniel Cox, polemba m’nyuzipepala ya New York Times, ananena kuti tikuoneka kuti tili mu “kutsika kwachuma” kwa mabwenzi. Zikuoneka kuti pali maganizo ambiri okhudza chifukwa chake izi zikuchitika. Pali kuvomereza kwina komabe za zotsatira za kulumikizana ndi thanzi lathu lamalingaliro ndi thupi. Kudzipatula komanso kusungulumwa kumazindikirika nthawi zambiri ngati zovuta zachipatala komanso zaumoyo wa anthu, makamaka achikulire, zomwe zimadzetsa zovuta m'maganizo ndi thupi.
Malinga ndi Survey on American Life, anthufe timaoneka kuti tili ndi anzathu apamtima ochepa, timacheza ndi anzathu mocheperapo, ndipo timadalira anzathu kuti atithandize. Pafupifupi theka la anthu aku America lipoti abwenzi apamtima atatu kapena ocheperapo, pomwe 36% amafotokoza anayi mpaka asanu ndi anayi. Zina mwa zikhulupiriro zake ndi monga kuchepa kwa anthu ochita nawo zinthu zachipembedzo, kuchepa kwa mabanja, kuchepa kwachuma, kudwala matenda osachiritsika, kugwira ntchito nthawi yayitali, komanso kusintha kwa ntchito. Ndipo, popeza ambiri aife timadalira malo ogwira ntchito kuti tilumikizane, izi zakulitsa kusungulumwa komanso kudzipatula.
Pali ma nuances osangalatsa mu data. Mwachitsanzo, anthu aku Africa America ndi Hispanic amawoneka okhutitsidwa ndi mabwenzi awo. Komanso, akazi amakonda kudalira anzawo kuti awathandize maganizo. Amayesetsa kukulitsa maubwenzi awo…ngakhale kuuza mnzawo kuti amawakonda! Komano, 15% ya amuna amanena kuti palibe maubwenzi apamtima. Izi zawonjezeka ndi zisanu pazaka 30 zapitazi. Robert Garfield, wolemba komanso katswiri wa zamaganizo, akunena kuti amuna amakonda “kusokoneza mabwenzi awo;” kutanthauza kuti samapatula nthawi kuti azisamalira.
Kudzipatula ndi kusakhala ndi cholinga kapena kusayanjana ndi ena, pomwe kusungulumwa kumatanthawuza kuti ndi chinthu chosafunika kwenikweni. Mawuwa ndi osiyana, ngakhale kuti nthawi zambiri amagwiritsidwa ntchito mosiyana, ndipo onse ali ndi zotsatira zofanana pa thanzi. Kudzipatula ndi kusungulumwa ndizofala kwambiri m'magulu achikulire. Kafukufuku wapadziko lonse akuwonetsa kuti pafupifupi munthu m'modzi mwa anthu anayi achikulire omwe amakhala m'derali akuti amadzipatula, ndipo pafupifupi 30% amafotokoza kuti asungulumwa.
Chifukwa chiyani kuchuluka kwaukwati kungakhudze? Chabwino, malinga ndi kafukufukuyu, pafupifupi 53% ya omwe amapereka lipoti amanena kuti mwamuna kapena mkazi wawo nthawi zambiri amakumana nawo koyamba. Ngati mulibe wina wofunikira, ndiye kuti mutha kukhala osungulumwa.
Zotsatira zofanana ndi kusuta kapena kunenepa kwambiri?
Poganizira kuchuluka kwa zomwe zapezedwazi, opereka chithandizo choyambirira ayenera kuganizira momwe thanzi limakhudzira kudzipatula komanso kusungulumwa, makamaka kwa okalamba. Kafukufuku wochuluka akuwonetsa kugwirizana kwakukulu pakati pa kudzipatula ndi kusungulumwa komwe kumakhala ndi zotsatira zoipa. Kufa kwa zifukwa zonse kumawonjezeka mofanana ndi kusuta fodya kapena kunenepa kwambiri. Pali matenda ambiri amtima komanso matenda amisala. Zina mwa izi zimachitika chifukwa cha anthu omwe akudzipatula omwe amafotokoza za kusuta fodya kwambiri komanso makhalidwe ena oipa. Anthu odzipatulawa amagwiritsa ntchito chithandizo chamankhwala chochulukirapo chifukwa nthawi zambiri amakhala ndi matenda osachiritsika. Panthawi imodzimodziyo, amanena kuti sakutsatira malangizo achipatala omwe amapeza.
Momwe mungayankhire
Pa mbali yopereka chithandizo, "kulembera anthu" ndi njira imodzi. Uku ndikuyesa kugwirizanitsa odwala ndi ntchito zothandizira anthu ammudzi. Izi zitha kukhala kugwiritsa ntchito woyang'anira milandu yemwe amatha kuwunika zolinga, zosowa, chithandizo chabanja ndikutumiza anthu. Madokotala nthawi zambiri amatumizanso odwala kumagulu othandizira anzawo. Izi zimakonda kugwira ntchito bwino kwa odwala omwe ali ndi vuto limodzi lachipatala kapena chikhalidwe. Mphamvu zamaguluwa ndikuti odwala nthawi zambiri amamvera malingaliro ochokera kwa ena omwe ali ndi vuto lofananalo. Ena mwa maguluwa tsopano amakumananso mu "zipinda zochezera" kapena malo ena ochezera a pa Intaneti.
Catherine Pearson, polemba mu Times pa Novembara 8, 2022 adafotokoza njira zinayi zomwe tonsefe tingaganizire pothana ndi malingaliro odzipatula kapena kusungulumwa:
- Yesetsani kukhala pachiwopsezo. Ndikulankhulanso ndekha pano. Zokwanira ndi umuna kapena stoicism. Ndi bwino kuuza anthu mmene mukumvera. Ganizirani zolowa m'magulu a anzanu kuti muthandizidwe. Ganizirani kugawana zovuta zanu ndi mnzanu.
- Musaganize kuti mabwenzi amangochitika mwangozi kapena mwamwayi. Amafunika kuchitapo kanthu. Kufikira munthu.
- Gwiritsani ntchito zinthu kuti zipindule. Zoona zake n’zakuti, ambiri a ife timamasuka kuyanjana ndi ena ngati tikuchita nawo zinthu zina. Ndi zabwino kwambiri. Atha kukhala masewera, kapena kusonkhana pamodzi kukonza kapena kupanga chinachake.
- Gwiritsirani ntchito mphamvu ya "kulowa" mwachisawawa kudzera m'mawu kapena imelo. Kungakhale chilimbikitso chimene munthu akufunikira lerolino, kungodziwa kuti akuganiziridwa.
aafp.org/pubs/afp/issues/2021/0700/p85.html
Kuphunzira kwa American Perspectives Meyi 2021
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