Wechina Ngaave Newe
Sezvatiri kuswedera kune rimwe remazuva matsvene muNerd-lore, Chivabvu 4 [ave newe], ndinoyeuchidzwa nezvechokwadi-chehupenyu nyaya yemwana aingoda zvihwitsi zvemahara nemukana wekubuda ega.
Nguva yakareba yapfuura, mune imwe nzvimbo iri kure, kure kure "Star Wars" ndiyo yaive bhaisikopo riri mundangariro dzevanhu vese. Ichokwadi chaive mupfungwa dzangu. Nguva dzose.
"Humambo Hunodzokera shure" yakanga isati yabuda, ndoda prequels. Shamwari dzangu neni takaunganidza manhamba edu ezviito uye tikaratidza zviitiko nenzira chaiyo yataigona kuyeuka. Iyi yaive pre-internet uye vazhinji vedu tisati tambove neVHS, saka isu takachengeta bhaisikopo riine hupenyu setsika yemuromo senge "Iliad." Ini ndaive ndingangoita gumi uye pandakatarisa mudenga usiku, ndaida kuve mumwe weavo vanoita manhamba.
Kare kumashure, Halloween hwaive husiku hwekupenga kwakanyanya, apo vabereki vakasunungura vana vavo uye vachivimba kuti vaizoenda kumba kwavo kana vaneta. Yakanga iri nguva iyo chinhu chakaipisisa chingangoitika kwauri chaive kumhanyira kuvana vakuru vanogona kupamba ruoko rwako. Isu takanga tichitanga kurova zera apo Halloween ndiyo yega chikonzero chakakodzera chekupfeka sewaunofarira hunhu paruzhinji. Iwe unogona kutombopihwa mubairo nesipi yemahara! Chero rimwe zuva uye vana vakuru vaikuseka zvisina tsitsi.
Iri raive gore apo munin'ina wangu Marcia anga awira muzera repakati pakati pekuenda kunotora zviwitsi nekugara pamba kuti azvipfuure, saka akafunga kundibatsira kuvaka koshitomu. Aida kugadzira chimwe chinhu chinonakidza, chekugadzira, chemanomano. Ini ndanga ndisingade kuve mumwe wevazhinji veHan Solos kana Luke Skywalkers vanofamba vachikomberedza nharaunda. Shamwari dzangu dzinenge mbiri dzainge dzichironga kuve Han Solo, saka ndingadai ndakangove ndakashata Solo kumashure. Ndaidawo kudziirwa. Senge shamwari dzangu, ini ndaimbove hobo kana mushandi wekuvaka makore mana achimhanya, nekuda kwekusanzwisisika kweColorado chiitiko chechando chekutanga chegore chinowira paHalloween husiku.
Ini naMarcia takagara pasi tichifunga hembe. Ini ndakanga ndawana paki ye "Star Wars" makadhi ekutengesa pane imwe nguva, saka isu takatanga nekutarisa kuburikidza neaya. Sezvo paingova neakangoita gumi makadhi mupakeji uye sezvo ini ndanga ndisingade kuenda seye tie-murwi kana saPrincess Leia, takagara paTusken Raider - munhu wejecha. Isu takave nemusoro wakanaka pakadhi kuti ndiende kubva, asi kuti ndizive zvimwe zvese zvehembe, ndakwereta chiito chimiro kubva kumwana wepedyo. Mufananidzo uye chimiro muruoko, takaunganidza zvinhu ndokuenda kunoshanda.
Kana iwe uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchitsvaga. Ivo vakapfekedzwa magaro emugwenga-anogara humanoid ane goggles, mhepo inofema uye isinganzwisisike nyanga dzesimbi dzinobuditsa mummy-kunge kumeso kumonera.
Isu takagadzira mweya wangu wekufema nekukombama ndiro yealuminium pie kuti inyatso kukwana pamuromo wangu uye chidimbu chejira dema chakanamatidzwa-mukati kuitira iyo skrini. Zvigubhu zvangu zvaive makapu emakoni emazai maviri, sirivheri-yakapendwa. Mamwe makapu emakoni emakoni akaputirwa pamusoro wangu ne gauze. Kuti ndipedze musangano wese, ndaipfeka gumbeze rekare rakarongedzwa pamusoro pangu poncho, uye nedzimwe bhutsu dzakasviba. Ndakatakura mubato wetsvairo kuti ndizunguze pamusoro pemusoro wangu panguva yakafanira. Ini ndakanga ndagara.
Nehurombo, gadziriro yese yaive yakawandisa kushamwari dzangu kutakura. Kana zuva parakazonyura pazasi pechadenga, uye maflakes ekutanga akatanga kudonha, akaunganidzwa pamatanho uye akange aenda-kure, atove kurira pashuga inoyerera yemwaka. Ini ndakabuda panze pava paya, ndichinyatso tarisa chikamu: hunhu hweparutivi husina kuoneka mune zvine mutsindo bhaisikopo re blockbuster renguva dzese. Ini ndanga ndichifema jongwe rependi nependi yegasi kuburikidza nepie plate ventilator. Ndichitarisa pasirese kuburikidza nemucheto wemakapu emazai maviri emazai, ini ndaive munyika yangu ndega.
Kwaive kunze kwemubvunzo wekuti ndinofanira kuenda kunze kwehusiku ndega, nekuti makatoni ezai aisabvumidza chero chiratidzo cheparutivi uye utsi hwakabatwa mukati memhepo yekufemera zvaive zvichikanganisa hunyanzvi hwangu hwemota. Kunyangwe nerubatsiro rwevashandi vangu vehondo / tsvimbo yekufamba, ini ndaitofanirwa kutungamirwa kubva pasuo nesuo. Marcia akafamba neni achienda kudzimba dzevamwe shamwari dzake, uye dzimba zhinji dzaive pakati.
Pavakavhura musuwo, varidzi vedzimba vasina fungidziro vakasangana neumwe munhu wavasina kuziva, vachisimudza kamuti pamusoro pemusoro wavo, vachiita ruzha runotyisa, "Gluuurrrtlurrrtlllrrrrr!" Ini ndaida kuva pachokwadi. Chokwadi chinotaurirwa, izvi ndezvese zvanga zvasara nezve kugona kwangu kwekutaura chero zvakadaro, mushure mekubvongodza hutsi hwependi kumabhuroko mashoma.
Masuwo mashoma airohwa. Asi vamwe, kunyanya avo vanopfuura nepano pamasuo ezvekuchengetedza, vakangotora nhanho kumashure ndokubvunza vachifunga, "Saka, iwe unofanirwa kuve chii, mukomana mudiki?" ndisati ndakanda chihwitsi muhomwe yangu. Mhinduro yangu imwechete kumibvunzo yese "Gluuurrrtlurrrrt!" anga asiri ruzivo rwakakwana zvekuti Marcia aigaro chime mukuti ini ndaive Tusken Raider (chii?).
Dzimwe shamwari dzehanzvadzi yangu dzaitonhorera dzaive nenguva dzekurangarira kamwe kamwe uye dzakauya padhuze nekushamisika nekubata chaiko uye nebasa rakapinda mumupendero. Ndainzwa kunge nyeredzi pane imwe yekuwedzera.
Mushure mekufamba mamwe mabhureki mashoma uye kuti ndiro yangu yepayi ibude kanoverengeka, ndakadhonza nguvo yangu ndokunamatira kumba. Handina kuwana zvihwitsi zvakawandisa seshamwari dzangu gore riya. Vakadzoka kumba vane mabhegi ane brimming, vafamba mamaira uye vakapamba nzvimbo dziri kure kure. Ini ndaizodzoka kumba nechimwe chinhu chakareba-kusara pane iwo madiki mabhokisi emazambiringa akaomeswa. Ndakauya kumba ndine chivimbo chekuyedza zvinhu zvaive zvishoma pane zvakajairwa.
Gore iro, ndakadzidza kuti kana ukazviisa panjodzi uye iwe uri TOO wakasiyana, ungatadza kuwana zvihwitsi zvakawanda. Kubva ipapo zvakadaro, ini ndakadzidza kuti kana iwe uchirega yako nerd mureza kubhururuka, haungopone chete, asi pamwe kuwana ruremekedzo rwevanhu vanogona kurondedzera. Vanhu vako vari kunze uko, iyi ndo nzira yekuvawana nayo. Wese munhu nerds-kunze kwechimwe chinhu, vamwe kupfuura vamwe. Iyo inogona kuve imwe yeakakora senge mitauro yemakomputa kana sci-fi, asi iwe unogona kunetseka pamusoro pemafirimu kana mitambo, kubika, kofi. Chero chii zvacho.
Kana iwe wakambozvibata iwe pachako uchiudza mumwe munhu, "Aya haasi madhiri auri kutsvaga," uye ndokusimudza ruoko rwako mukuedza kusingachinje pfungwa yemumwe munhu, unogona kuva nerd. Iyo inokurumidza iwe kubvuma pachako kuti iwe uri nerd, nekukurumidza iwe unogona kufema uye kungova izvo zvauri. Pamwe edza kusadanidzira, "Urrrrgluuurrrtlurrrtlllrrrrr!" uye panzvimbo zevezeve, "Dai wechina ave newe."