Lokho Ukukhuluma Esidlangalaleni Kwangifundisa Ngobuholi

Lapho ngisesikoleni esiphakeme, ngafundisa ukukhuluma obala iminyaka emibili. Bekuyikilasi lami engilithanda kakhulu ukufundisa ngoba kwakuyisifundo esidingekayo kuwo wonke ama-majors, ngakho-ke ngaba nelungelo lokuxhumana nabafundi abanezizinda ezihlukahlukene, izintshisekelo kanye nezifiso. Ubumnandi besifundo kwakungewona umuzwa ofanayo - abafundi babevame ukuhamba ngosuku lokuqala bekhophozela, bezingele futhi/noma bebukeka bethukile ngokuphelele. Kuvele ukuthi akekho owayebheke ngabomvu isemester yokukhuluma esidlangalaleni ukwedlula mina. Cishe eminyakeni eyishumi nengxenye kamuva, ngiye ngakholelwa ukuthi kuningi okwafundiswa kuleso sifundo kunokunikeza inkulumo emnandi. Ezinye zezimiso eziyisisekelo zenkulumo ekhumbulekayo nazo ziyizimfundiso ezibalulekile zobuholi obuphumelelayo.

1. Sebenzisa isitayela esingafundiwe.

Ekukhulumeni esidlangalaleni, lokhu kusho ukuthi ungayifundi inkulumo yakho. Yazi – kodwa ungezwakali njengerobhothi. Kubaholi, lokhu kukhuluma ngokubaluleka kokuba nguwe weqiniso. Vuleleka ekufundeni, funda ngesihloko kodwa yazi ubuqiniso bakho yisithako esibalulekile ekusebenzeni kwakho njengomholi. NgokukaGallup, "ubuholi abulingani - futhi uzoba umholi ongcono kakhulu ongaba nguye uma uthola ukuthi yini ekwenza ube namandla ahlukile." ¹ Izikhulumi ezinhle azilingisi ezinye izikhulumi ezinhle - zincika kusitayela sazo esiyingqayizivele kaninginingi. Abaholi abakhulu bangenza okufanayo.

 

2. Amandla e-amygdala.

Ngesikhathi abafundi befika bethukile bengena ekilasini ngosuku lokuqala lwesemester, bahlangatshezwa nesithombe semvukuzane enoboya ecwebezelayo ebhodini elimhlophe. Isifundo sokuqala sesemester ngayinye sasimayelana nokuthi lesi sidalwa nokukhuluma esidlangalaleni kwakufana ngani. Impendulo? Kokubili kusebenze i-amygdala kubantu abaningi okusho ukuthi ubuchopho bethu busho enye yalezi zinto:

"INGOZI! INGOZI! Balekani amagquma!”

"INGOZI! INGOZI! Thola igatsha lesihlahla futhi wehlise leyo nto!”

"INGOZI! INGOZI! Angazi ukuthi ngenzenjani ngizovele ngibe yiqhwa, ngethemba ukuthi anginakwa ngilinde kudlule ingozi.”

Le mpendulo yokulwa/indiza/yokumisa iyindlela yokuvikela ebuchosheni bethu, kodwa ayisebenzi ngaso sonke isikhathi. Lapho i-amygdala yethu icushiwe, sithatha ngokushesha ukuthi sinokukhetha kanambambili (ukulwa/ukundiza) noma ukuthi akukho nhlobo ukukhetha (iqhwa). Kaningi kunalokho, kunezinketho zesithathu, zesine, nesesihlanu.

Mayelana nobuholi, i-amygdala yethu ingasikhumbuza ngokubaluleka kokuhola ngenhliziyo - hhayi nje ngamakhanda ethu. Ukuhola ngenhliziyo kubeka abantu phambili futhi kubeka ubudlelwano phambili. Kudinga ukubeka izinto obala, ubuqiniso kanye nokuzinika isikhathi sokwazi abasebenzi ngokwezinga lomuntu siqu. Kuholela ekutheni abasebenzi bahlanganyele kakhulu emisebenzini yabo ngezinga eliphezulu lokwethenjwa. Kulesi simo, abasebenzi namaqembu kungenzeka ukuthi bahlangabezane futhi badlule imigomo.

Ukuhola kusukela ekhanda noma engqondweni kubeka phambili imigomo, amamethrikhi, namazinga aphezulu okusebenza kahle. Encwadini yakhe ethi, “The Fearless Organization,” u-Amy Edmondson uthi emnothweni wethu omusha sidinga zombili izitayela zobuholi. Abaholi abaphumelela kakhulu bayakwazi ukungena kuzo zombili izitayela².

Ngakho-ke, lokhu kubopha kanjani emuva ku-amygdala? Ngokwami ​​ulwazi, ngiyaqaphela ukuthi ngisahamba phambili ngekhanda kuphela lapho ngizwa sengathi kunezinto ezimbili kuphela ongakhetha kuzo - ikakhulukazi lapho ngibhekene nokwenza isinqumo esikhulu. Kulezi zikhathi, ngisebenzise lokhu njengesikhumbuzo ukuze ngingene kubantu ukuze ngithole indlela yesithathu. Njengabaholi, asidingi ukuzizwa sivaleleke kuma-binaries. Kunalokho, singahola ngenhliziyo ukuze sithole indlela ehehayo, enomvuzo, futhi enomthelela emigomeni yethu nasemaqenjini ethu.

3. Yazi izethameli zakho

Kuso sonke isemester, abafundi banikeze izinhlobo ezahlukene zezinkulumo - ezifundisayo, zenqubomgomo, eziyisikhumbuzo nezimemayo. Ukuze baphumelele, kwakubalulekile ukuthi bazi izethameli zabo. Ekilasini lethu, lokhu kwenziwa ngobuningi beziqu, izizinda nezinkolelo. Iyunithi engangiyithanda kakhulu kwakuyizinkulumo zenqubomgomo ngoba izinhlangothi zombili zezinqubomgomo eziningi zazivame ukwethulwa.

Kubaholi, ukwazi iqembu lakho kuyefana nokwazi izethameli zakho. Ukwazi iqembu lakho kuyinqubo eqhubekayo edinga ukungena njalo. Okunye kokungena engikukhonzile kuvela kuDkt. Brenè Brown. Uqala imihlangano ngokucela abakhona ukuba banikeze amagama amabili ngendlela abazizwa ngayo ngalolo suku³. Lo mkhuba wakha ukuxhumana, ukuba yingxenye, ukuphepha kanye nokuzazi.

Isikhulumi kufanele sazi izilaleli zaso ukuze inkulumo iphumelele. Kunjalo nakubaholi. Kokubili ubudlelwano besikhathi eside kanye nokungena njalo kubalulekile .

4. Ubuciko bokukholisa

Njengoba ngishilo, uphiko lwenkulumo yenqubomgomo kwakuyinto engangiyithanda kakhulu ukufundisa. Kwakujabulisa ukubona ukuthi yiziphi izindaba ezithinta abafundi abanentshisekelo futhi ngajabulela ukuzwa izinkulumo ezazihloselwe ukumela isikhundla, kunokumane ngiguqule imiqondo yontanga. Abafundi kwakudingeka ukuthi bangagcini nje ngokuphikisana ngenkinga ekhona kodwa futhi baphakamise izixazululo ezintsha zokubhekana naleyo nkinga. Abafundi abaphumelele kakhulu ekubhaleni nasekuthuleni lezi zinkulumo, yilabo asebecwaninge kahle zonke izinhlangothi zezindaba futhi beza nezixazululo ezingaphezu kwesisodwa ezihlongozwayo.

Kimina, lesi yisibonelo esifanele sobuholi obusebenzayo. Ukuze sihole amaqembu futhi sishayele imiphumela, sidinga ukucaca kakhulu enkingeni esizama ukuyixazulula futhi sivulekele izixazululo ezingaphezu kwesisodwa ukuze senze umthelela esiwufunayo. Encwadini yakhe ethi, “Drive,” uDaniel Pink uthi isihluthulelo sokugqugquzela abantu akulona uhlu lwezinto okufanele uziqedele noma uzifeze, kodwa kunalokho ukuzimela kanye nekhono lokuqondisa umsebenzi nezimpilo zabo. Lesi esinye sezizathu zokuthi kungani izindawo zokusebenza zemiphumela kuphela (ama-ROWE) ziboniswe ukuthi zihlobene nokwanda okukhulu kokukhiqiza. Abantu abafuni ukutshelwa ukuthi benzeni. Badinga umholi wabo ukuthi abasize ekunikezeni ukuqonda okucacile kwemigomo yabo ukuze bakwazi ukuyifinyelela ukuthi bafuna kanjani futhi nini⁴. Indlela engcono kakhulu yokunxenxa abantu ukuthi bangene kugqozi lwabo lwangaphakathi ukuze bakwazi ukuziphendulela futhi bazibophezele ngemiphumela yabo.

Njengoba ngihlezi futhi ngizindla ngamahora engiwachithe ngilalele izinkulumo, ngithemba ukuthi ngisho nedlanzana labafundi engibe nelungelo lokubafundisa bayokholelwa ukuthi ikilasi lokukhuluma lalingaphezu kokubhekana ubuso nobuso nokwesaba kwabo nsuku zonke. Ngithemba ukuthi nabo banezinkumbulo ezinhle zamakhono okuphila nezifundo esizifunde ndawonye e-Eddy Hall e-Colorado State University.

Okubhekwayo

¹gallup.com/cliftonstrengths/zu/401999/leadership-authenticity-starts-knowing-yourself.aspx

²forbes.com/sites/nazbeheshti/2020/02/13/do-you-mostly-lead-from-your-head-or-from-your-heart/?sh=3163a31e1672

³panoramaed.com/blog/two-word-check-in-strategy

⁴IDrayivu: iqiniso elimangazayo ngalokho okusishukumisayo